365/365 2014.

Today. 31.12.2014. Wow, it's the last day of 2014. No motivation for any revision and just walk here and there, sit here and there lifelessly and decided to just sit down and blogging for the last update for 2014.

Well, just like what I promised. I will share my little little memories of the past vacation with my dear family. Aaron, Beauty, Crystal and Daniel decided to visit Hong Kong (LOL), well, frankly we thought we will be going to Bangkok this year but dk who suggested HK, then Ciao. We packed and went to HK. The 7 days in HK were excited and happy. We enjoyed a lot because one of my dad's cousin is working there. Furthermore, the transportation system in HK is just convenient, and without any language barriers, we managed to survive there and everything flows smoothly. Guess what, many people praised me because I can speak cantonese fluently. 

The weather in HK was cold. Really cold. 

We din shopped alot because there isn't much thing to shop. They are having winter. So, everywhere was selling winter clothes that we don't need in Malaysia. I bought shoes and a handbag. Oh yeah! And an expensive leotard. Quite expensive there but the design not bad. BUtttttt, I still can't wear it to class because of my XLLLLLLLLL body figure. We went to Ocean Park but not disneyland. Will be visiting Disneyland next time but the dolphin show in OP was great! They were cute and greattt!! Never forget the pandas. They were sleeping all the time. But they were just cute!! Holy... keep telling daddy I wanna go HK again!! 

Never forget to thank Uncle How and Aunty Elvina for everything done in HK. Aunty Elvina was soooo friendly and kind. Cherish those times we talked and shared a lot in the bus, telling me ur stories and giving me advice and etc. Promise to visit us when ure back from HK. I miss the two little girls too. Coincidentally, Uncle and Aunty May were in HK too. Love playing with their children. Tiffany and Tracia. Both of them like Frozen. Keep singing in the trams. Aww... I miss those days in HK....!! <3

I like the lifestyle of HK. Although people there are busy. They walk fast, talk fast and react fast. But idk why I love that place. <3

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Having a short holiday break. Free from college, ballet, istd tap and cstd tap. Totally free from everything. But I spent time on completing all assignments that I owed. U know right, MICHEAL KHOR always gives us extra assignments. FML. Makes my life miserable. Ms Shireen's BS nearly killed me though. However, I still managed to complete all her assignments. Completed revision for Econs and BS. But crap I stuck at Tort. Totally zero for TORT. After 10 minutes, I started twitting, whatsapp and wechat. Never forget, snapchatting. LOL... >.<

 I hope I can start my law revision soon. Holy. Accounting also zero. I still dun uds.

Having a great week. A small gathering with Jolyn, Jiajun and Mouxian. Dear Mouxian just back from India and Jo just back from Malacca. I miss them very much. We knew each other since 12..? around that age. We were having CEFL. A big group then slowly MX left us then slowly left me and JO. But we still managed to contact each other, having a messy group chatting. Then, we decided to meet up. Jun was our driver. Three of us just hopped into his car then ciao Midvalley. ( again..) thats like a second home for me and JO. Too close and we always lepak that area haha. We had starbucks, intalianese and nana's green tea. My tummy was bloated haha. We kept playing snap chats and hell ya, mx and Jun finally knew how to play. so these days... I keep sending my selfies to them. They keep SS it... T.T 

Went to Pav with my bae Mun. Thanks for accompanying me dear. Knowing my stories, telling me secrets, cheering me up and never forget that MOVIE haha. Shopping and high tea and..... our late Christmas and new year gifts. Thanks a lot and forgiving me for being stubborn. I know u care me much. I know and I uds. My dear, its touching when theres someone staying there and listen to you whenever u need them. You know what? I realized that we are growing together. We are on the path of chasing our own dreams and we are helping each other to pursue our goals. I love you bae. Take caring me whenever I was having ups and downs. You know me well, dear bitch. Thank you for accompanying me yesterday. A bitchy dating we had.

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It's time to have a to-do-list for 2015!

1. Stay fit and slimmer. pls. This was always in my list. But fml I had never achieved before. Never. I achieved all goals for 2014 but I am still fat. Damn it, I am still fat. Its not a good feeling when u having a cute size. No dress to wear. No handsome wants you. Heh, but I know many people love me because I am cute although I am fat. Do more exercise pls Crystal.

2. Be determined and stay firm on the path. I need to success, I must success, I want to chase my dreams. It's not an easy job to achieve all of them. But without any hardwork, I will get nothing. Having a large dream to be a successful woman, having own dance studio, bringing family to maldives, travelling with my love, and never forget--- SANTORINI. I must stay strong in order to make my dreams come true. I know I will. You know though.

3. Complete my Adv2 ballet and stay active in ISTD and CSTD Tap. Dancing always my life. I like to perform. I hope I have a chance to stand on the stage again. Dance and perform for my love ones. Keep dancing. I don't have a nice body, I don't have a nice arche, but I can dance like a mad. I love dancing. The only way I can express my happiness and sadness. I hope I can still dance.

4. Be happy and stay strong. And stronger. Think positive and cheer up no matter what happens. Love myself more than never. I am the best girl in town. tsktsk. Keep smiling no matter what. Obstacles and odds will be solve easily. Fighting my dear Crystal.

5. Stay sweet with my families, friends and mlbf. Thanks my parents and my brother for take caring and loving me so much. I will love u guys more and more. Thanks my friends standing with me no matter what. College mates, secondary friends, ballet friends and those appearing my life. Thank you being my friends. Our friendship still counting. Thank you my dear mlbf. No matter what happened, mentally support and heart you always. Let us hold our hands together and make everything solve no matter how. Thank you for loving me and caring me. You are my favorite. My favorite place: ur arms. ILY, IHY, INU,IWU. Thanks for being with me. You belong with me. 

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Thank you for knowing Crystal.

Lo, 
Crys.

MLBF.

Just back from HongKong. Damn tiring and suffering insomnia. IDK why. Should gather up everything to tell you stories about all experiences in HK. A week vacation. Well, basically I missed all the classes. Especially Accounting. I missed all those homeworks and holy shit its MANY. Erm, yeah feeling like typing and spilling out but totally tired to type all about HK now. Maybe next post? Promise.

Events happened in the week. A lot and all by myself  ( I mean I should learn not to rely?). I feel hard to catch up with contract and tort. I mean... all the basics. Bae was not around when I was back. Its like messing everything up. I miss my bae. That much like drowning him with stars in Wechat, throwing him all emoji in whatsapp, sending him all ugly snapchats, etc. Well. Being so lazy to copy all notes from sim, catching everything just up to date like others. Like recently I heard something that really ruined ONE of my day. I mean today?

Dragging a matter for 3 years, is that suffering? yeah. For both   or more parties. I mean ever since I met lawyer. I was totally suffered between Prince and Lawyer. I felt so stupid and crazy for everything those days. Thinking which or who or what and why. Then finally. Jumped to the conclusion, both aren't my final decision until now I meet my MLBF. Its dramatic. Was stucked between two and now someone had rescued me and I let it go. After somedays, I realized lawyer did/do chose me. And I was like. Well. I deserve better. ( basically, what I need to do now is just type and release). I feel so funny and retard now. Its like after choosing someone else and now finally that ass wants you back? Are you fooling me? After letting everything go and make it clear, you asked me about my decision and try to destroy what I have now. I chose my MLBF and now I am still choosing dear MLBF. ( neh, you're late) at least I am happy with what happens to me now and what I have. Although MLBF not always by my side ( it's much better than LDR), but at least he calms me down whenever I need him. Maybe it doesn't mean forever but trust me, those who worth deserve chances. I gave both of us a chance. And before that, u ruined everything. Like everything. It tortured me when u don't give a fuq. 

However, thanks MLBF appeared in my life. Cherish every moments we had and will have. 
Was so happy reading Jie's blog. Knowing she has someone who can cherish her and take good care of her, I feel so happy. My dear Jie from another parents,  I miss you and your shoulders. I really hope you do well there and achieve all your goals. Stay sweet and love.

Promise. Next post. HongKong trip. <3

Lo,
Crys.

Changed.

Am using my oppo to update this post. Quite funny using blog apps to update my bloggy. Ballet class just over. Sweats dripping everywhere like what it used to be. A towel and my leotard all were wet. But what different was there isnt potato gang to play with. I mean I can't really wipe my bloody sweats on their body. But luckily I found my personal human towel. That towel will be there whenever I need it.

Waiting for Ms Yip in ds now. I need her information for our next vacation. Will be away for one week. Quite excited but then will be suffering too haha. U know why.

Things changed like everything is different. Totally CHANGED. I think my mood and my attitude. Like LOL. Nowadays I face everything calmly and peacefully. Well,but used to it I will not share anything when I am sad. But now if I face any obstacles, I will be quiet and analyse everything myself. I mean maybe something and someone entered to my life and started to change the inner part of me. I mean I felt that slightly changes appeared. I will not burst my anger whenever I want... I mean I become more...relax? Idk.

Actually everything stucks between IDK and IDC. Sometimes I knew something but I won't spill out because IDC at all or If u want to piss me off with ur annoying ways... am sorry. IDC.

Having weak body these days. Always feel headache and dizzy. Lack of sleep. Anywhere, class started and A2 will be a challenging course. Will do whatever can to achieve all the goals.

Dip n Dip

Sometimes we just need to pour our words out from our heart.

Life after AS sucks.

Lifeless. This was what he kept telling me. He is lifeless. We are lifeless after the last papers. It's like wake up early every morning, waiting for texts, waiting for dramas, waiting for time and waiting for A2. Well, A2 classes all commencing next week and I will be absent for the first day, first vacation maybe? Then, few days later will escape to another country too. >< It's like so LIFELESS. That feeling you can't start any revision or any subject. A2 Contract and Tort. How to start? It will be damn rush for the A2 syllabus to complete in 5 months. All the best then.

Life. He is working now and I am fooling around at home. Having a lunch date with Jenny tomorrow. Going to bangsar. Maybe? I miss those days chit chatting and those students I used to play with. Was planning to lagoon next week but most of them couldn't make it... So... will postpone it till year end break. Holy. Dec is coming!

Speechless and bye for now. See ya next time <3

Lo, Crys.

自己的幸福

那天弟弟把《拾穗》放在我的桌面就去上课了，朦朦胧胧翻开了里面，以为离校了，我的作品都会消失得无隐无踪，可是我终究看见了自己多年前的作品。最初的梦想只能自己背着背包到处去旅行，写写日记，感恩生活，把自己的生活有无规律地记录，做个作家。但是，很快我就知道现实永远都是残酷的。作家是一份赚不了钱的工作，一份吃力不讨好的工作，怎样可以完成我那比天还要高的梦想？很快，清醒了过来，把书念好，把钱储蓄好，再出去闯吧！回到我的作品，一个不知天高地厚的小女孩，为什么就那么创作呢？我喜欢张小娴，九把刀，橘子；应该是因为我喜欢阅读别人的故事，在别人的世界，观看别人的精彩。我写过一段话：我说，我不是冰心，能把故事写得贴贴服服；我不是琼瑶，能把人物写得淋漓精致；我不是九把刀，把故事写进每个人的心里；我更不是徐志摩，能挥一挥衣袖，不带走任何云彩。唐诗宋词我都不懂，琴棋书画也半斤八两。我喜欢幻想，我喜欢分析，所以我跟喜欢写故事。我的故事，不是多少人能明白，但是多多少少也反映了我的世界，我的成长还有我的变化。

弟弟问我，姐，我从小看你那本校刊，记忆中，你的作品总是沉闷，沉重，怎么感受不了一丝丝甜甜开心的元素。我看着他，说：要你管？ 我想想，也是，其实我怎么都没有把自己的开心写成作品呢？纠结。我的大多作品都是：坚强，珍惜，感恩，希望。其实，我知道的，都有些伤感。想了好久真的好久，把这一篇写成我从来不提到的幸福吧。1996年，那天我出世了，一张很白很白的一张纸。的确，甫出娘胎，我是一个单纯得不得了的一个女孩。好像一个公主，让爸爸捧在手掌上呵护，要什么有什么。不是理所当然，而是小女孩也有不知足的时候。

小时候，总是埋怨爸妈把我关得紧紧的，管的严厉，教的严苛。没机会到同学家过夜，总是拿别人的父母比较。真傻！现在想起来，我也许比许多人幸福，爸爸不常加班，不常出国公干；妈妈不工作，在家里照顾我和弟弟。把我教得严谨，也是因为我的未来。而现在，我之所以能好好地一步一步走在实现梦想的道路上，功劳怎么少得了他们的呢？我是幸福的。从小到现在一直都在走自己想要的路，做自己喜欢的东西。喜欢跳舞，一直让我跳到现在。13年了，依然那么支持我。爸爸曾告诉我，看见舞台上的自己是多么的不一样，多么的快乐，因此多辛苦让我跳舞，他也会支持我。有那么爱我的父母，不幸福吗？我妈把一张旧旧的勉励纸贴在我的书桌前题目是：自己的幸福。

幸福不是用来炫耀的，
也不是用来比较的，
幸福如人饮水，冷暖自知。
它不是一个遥远的目标，
而是一个享受当下的过程。
只要怀有一颗感恩的心，
感恩生命，感恩生活，
感恩关爱自己的每一个人，
幸福就无处不在，
无时不有。
我们追求的是自己的幸福，而不是“比别人幸福”。

这段话，到今天我才能完全消化，原来我是那么的幸福。
我有一大群朋友，好朋友就那小组，知己就那几个。友情，我敢认我是一个有义气的朋友，无论发生任何事，我都会好好帮忙。一直以来，我有太多在前面对我笑，背后插几刀的朋友。我是那种不喜欢你我就避开不和你做朋友的人，我总是觉得能和我深交的朋友要懂得感恩，我虽然讲话尖锐，想法直接，不懂的拐弯抹角，但是我一定好好的对待他们。原来，他们对我也非常重要。相信吗？有那种朋友就是在你伤心的时候，他叫你什么都别说哭出来就是了；那种只是听你哭泣的朋友；那种能好好告诉你，什么事还有我；那种生气你被欺负的；那种任由你欺负的；那种好好听你的；那种相信你的。我是一个小气野蛮的朋友，有些自私，有些脾气，可是能和我做朋友的人，你要知道，宇宙那么大，我们能遇见，不是缘分是什么？我是幸福的，我遇见你们，开心玩笑的日子。谢谢你们，了解我仰或不了解我的。曾有个人告诉我：请你脱下面具好好面对自己。我可笑的朋友。我能静静坐在那里观察每个人的一举一动，我能笑着望着大家，时不时抛个笑话让大家放轻松，那种不让大家看明白的我，有时真的很累，虽然说，长大了，笑的机会少了，可是人活着也要懂得放松再往前走。我很倔强，倔强到自己都害怕。可是，少了身旁的朋友撑着我，我什么都不是。读书的，舞蹈的，学习的，所有出现在我生命的朋友，谢谢你们，让我那么幸福。

曾经以为自己再也遇不到一个让我那么奋不顾身的一个人。遇上你之前，我已经不相信那个存在。把自己封闭了好几年，搞不好你说，你才几岁，怕遇不到更好的吗？不，你不知道我是怎么一个人熬出来，让伤口好好愈合。在别人眼里，我可以是一个强女人，一个女强人，曾经有人告诉我，你不能一个人，因为一个人的你，让你倔强到不行，让人不敢靠近。这几年，我任性，放肆自己，我以为我不再会相信了，把那座墙建的高高的，人家进不来，我出不去。其实，锁匙一直插在门边，我只是没有扭开它的勇气。可是我一直知道我要对自己的心负责。我一直把所有人驱逐门外，天啊，我是怎么做到的？之前我都把多少的心伤害了。放弃了多少的机会。为什么会是你。你成了我的秘密，你知道吗？因为受伤了一次的女孩，当她得到第二次，她会比上一次捉得更紧，多紧？我不知道，只是你要知道，走到现在，其实都是好多人的奉献，若不是他们的错过，我们怎么会遇见？是对的人还是错的人，我不知道，我只知道，这些日子我们都很开心。所以我那么感恩现在的幸福。你知道吗？你给的小小甜蜜，可以引起大大的涟漪，我不炫耀我的幸福，我只是想要一个简简单单走下去的理由。我告诉你，我们都别算日子好吗？只是一天一天慢慢地一起走下去行吗？因为跌倒了一次，那个感觉好像失去了整个世界，你可能笑我傻，可是我想告诉你，就是因为那样我把自己囚禁了好久。我不要任何所谓的承诺因为我已经不相信，我只相信我们拥有的每一分每一刻。从彼此的不了解到拥有了彼此，我简单希望，我们能好好地，顺着彼此的心好好地。希望你能欣赏我的不完美，谅解我的缺点，我们都好好的。还是想告诉你，你是我的秘密。至少现在有你，陪着我，宠着我，我是幸福的。我不贪婪，不挑剔，只祈求不犯同样的错。感恩以前的他，教会我许多，让我长大，让我有机会遇见不一样的你。

星星的蜜语，谁知道？你知道吗？原来到此时此刻，我都那么感恩，自己的幸福。一直以来，让我长大的，从来不是我的敌人和那些伤害我的人，而是那些到现在为止还那么爱我包容我的人和那些让我成熟的考验。我承认，我脆弱。但是我肯定，我会坚强。有些时候，上了沉重枷锁的心扉早就可以解放了，钥匙就一直插在门把，只是看你有没有勇气去开启。你，能解开我的密码吗？

自己的幸福，请珍惜。不要逃避，过去的错误，对的人会欣赏。不要躲开，封锁自己，每一个人有幸福的权利。

你，谢谢你。让我有现在的小小幸福。无论以后怎样，都珍惜现在有的吧！

Lo,
Crys.

不用占有，想想就好。

Lucy in the sky.

Dears,

Randomly picked " Lucy in the sky" for today's post's title. One of my favorite where I usually hang around with my baes. It's a nice and peaceful environment but sometimes because of us, we ended up making noise around, sorry for the others.

Having a waiting period for those leftovers papers. Waiting periods are always the most frustrating time periods which students hate. Why don't Cambridge set those exams in a week? Planning here and there, people invite here and there but all arrangements must delayed until AS over.It's November. Seriously, I felt so lifeless in the previous month... I mean until today although so call exams are still ongoing... but still LIFELESS. Not meeting up with mates frequently just exams days etc. Okay, admit it. I miss ATC. I mean days fooling around with those "idiots" hah. However, luckily these days Jo accompanying me and of course Bae Mun also.

Just had my ISTD Tap Adv1 examination yesterday. Quite satisfied with my performance. Seriously, I was more confident in the teacher's dance. I always did my cell block tango quite steady. But yesterday was totally ... -.- Those exercises that I always get wrong timing, I get it all correct. Funny thing. Examiner was quite sweet and lovely. Smile face, sweet voice and PRETTY. She is the first examiner that we non stop praising her. ( * nice and smiley face not = kind-hearted and fair). Overall was alright, and we still remain best partner ever. I mean me and Phoebe. We partnered since I was 6 years old I think. This exam was without Louis, only both of us. Hope that we really amazed her. 

I really hope I can be more busy. Once, I remembered my piano teacher told me. If I have 72 hours a day, I will remain the same-- keep myself busy. Well, that's me. I want to whatever that can improve myself better. Planning to have RAD Adv2 ballet next year. So, I need to resume all ballet classes. Now starting to build up my stamina again. ( Lazy for this entire year, once per week >< should resume it at least 3 times a week)... Next year, my weekdays nights will pack with dancing nights. Must be VERY enjoying. I am joining CSTD Tap also. Planning to take part in the competition to upgrade myself ... I mean explore tap. Deeper and deeper. So, Ms yip asked me to join Miss Leong. Another experienced tap teacher. ( Which means I am doing two syllabus of tap. ISTD and CSTD ).
Always feel thankful to my dii and mii for providing me SUFFICIENT TIME and willing to pay my fees since young.

Listening to Adv2 music. Am typing this post while Jo working now. I started to play my piano these few days. ( how many years... ??) Although I am STILL and REMAIN WEAK with all those sharps and flats, bla bla bla. But dunno why Jo likes piano these days. Decided to play for Jo. Nothing much just learnt from the beginning again. Now should practice more then it will be better. 

* My dear BAE MUN, there isn't any story for you. ( >.<)
Hendrix and Ernie are going to have a baby sister next year. They grow a lot and cute. I miss them. <3
I got postcard from my sis Jenny <3 all the way from states. I miss her very much really much. <2
Listening to 郁可唯.


有时感动，不是唱歌的人拥有多少感情，有时感动，是听的人，他放了自己的感情进去。
                                                                                                                   ------ 《 你照亮我的星球》

Lo,
Crys.

A new day has come: 只是希望能有个人，在我说没事的时候，知道我不是真的没事；能有个人，在我强颜欢笑的时候，知道我不是真的开心。

Sweets,

Am sitting in the living room hitting my keyboard not in my study room; dad watching Paul Walker; mum using iPad to search for the HK trip hotels; bro conquering the study room for studying, he is having JUEC tomorrow. May all in his favor. Am not blogging in my study room, recently I keep referring my study room as the room I should escape from. Hah. A bit frustrated in that place. Having 3 more to go... Will be ok. Cheer Crystal! 

Law papers were down. Quite satisfied and relax now after the subject. But having two subjects in one week is not a good yet hard task for me... This is WOW. Touching movie huh HOURS-- Paul Walker... Waiting for econs paper. I was just exhausted to this PARTICULAR subject. I tried my best. Well, I will do my best to get a DISTINCTION. Its not a difficult subject. If the theories are clear, basically, its an interesting subject though. Accounting, well Mr Jasal made the subject very easy and interesting, more like a business minded studies, but required a lot of analysis. Not the theory parts, the chapters are too wide and hard to focus most of it. Was doing Marginal costing and Absorption costing this afternoon, quite miserable hah for me. Tried hard to concentrate with the marking schemes and finally get the solutions. Oh, I am a genius. Well yeah! For business studies, holy crap, having additional class from 9:30 to 5:00 on Monday! Survive huh. How to deal with it because having a whole day session of BS is quite boring. And business... well. Taking three subjects which relating to all commercial world today, I realized that most of their answers are linked and quite applicable in each questions. I mean, I can use my economic theory in my business studies; accounting ratios are all applicable in business studies and some part of business studies are related to the theory part of accounting. The three subjects are playing different roles together. Well, quite hard to focus but I learnt something. NEW.

如果一个人走累了，想休息一会儿，靠靠别人的肩，可是当对的人出现，可是遇不上对的时刻，人啊，怎么和上天比呢？我的秘密，是你给的甜蜜。

我們之間的距離好像忽遠又忽近
你明明不在我身邊我卻覺得很親
我心裡的祕密　是你給的甜蜜

我們之間的距離好像一點點靠近
是不是你對我也有一種特殊感情
我心裡的秘密　是我好像喜歡了你

Bye for now.
Lo, crys.

黑洞

如果前面有个黑洞，你会陪我一起跳下去吗？
昨天以前，我以为你会陪我一起跳下去。
昨天以后，我知道你会看清楚，摸清楚周围，再想想办法。
到时候，我已经掉下去了。我自己一个。
受伤后，我一直不再相信它的存在，往往把机会往外推，从不接受。
遇见以后，我毫不犹豫奋不顾身地再相信一次，可是事实告诉我，我又错了。

Stay strong Crys.
Love and care.

先喜欢上你，就像是先发现这个世界美好的一面，那又何须惆怅？

先说我的故事，你的故事在下面。

生活。

谁明白生命已经变何物。最近都忙着考试，睡觉考试，醒着考试，仿佛都活着考试。停下脚步，想了想，我要的生活，我要的未来，这些考试都是考验着我，让我更好地走向未来。是否勇敢坚持，随波逐流，坚毅地生活？我是一个有理想的女孩，一个不容易动摇的女孩，可是却是一个情绪化的小女人，爱撒娇的小妹妹，爱乱发脾气的小妞，爱大笑的女孩，一个什么都藏在心里的女生。有一天，可以成为无所不能的女强人，也可以成为一个懂得生活的小女孩。我要的生命很简单，我要快乐，我要简简单单的幸福，自己想做什么就做什么。

梦想。

从小我最大的梦想就是环游世界，哪里都可以，了解这个世界，了解这世界的人类，了解整个地球。所以，飞机师做不了，最快的方法就是念法律。努力非常努力地争取有的机会，让自己成长的机会，让自己成功的机会。最希望，有一天我能背包旅行，拿着笔记本，喝着咖啡，写写小说，享受生活的点滴。在英国的一间咖啡店写我的小说；在罗马的许愿次抛抛许愿；在希腊安稳的享受大自然；在巴黎铁塔附近的咖啡店写日记，多好！能实现，可是要努力。不要放弃。

成长。

本姑娘昨晚考完法律第一张考卷。老实说，读了那么久，尽了力，也无怨无悔了。加油吧！晚上没早睡，读完了一本小说 《我在云上爱你》张小娴。以前不是很喜欢爱情故事，可是就是迷上了张小娴，九把刀和橘子。有一天，有空的时候，我一定要到星巴克喝我爱的，看我爱的小说。前年，刘老师给了我们一篇作文《我是爱书人》，你不知道，独中生也蛮不喜欢华文节，尤其是作文课。那天赶这篇作文，我用了区区30分钟完成了这篇。结果，刘老师把我的作文复印贴堂。哈！真的，我爱书。我喜欢看别人的故事，让后把自己化成里面的故事人物，我泪浅，容易哭。昨晚，看了《我在云上爱你》，最后的结局弄得我哭得稀里哗啦。现实生活中有那么催泪的爱情吗？那是发生在16岁的爱情故事。男女主角最后没在一起，反而永隔了，不知道为什么老天就不眷顾他们。还是张小娴下笔的时候就决定不让他们在一起？心里又哭又闹，到底怎样，为什么就是悲剧？
“当你想起我，请你抬头仰望那片白云深处。”

朋友* 闺蜜

到你了啦，终于到你了。上了学院以后到现在为止，你应该是我最信得过的人吧！哈哈，我们在一起癫的时候，总是取笑人，总是笑话人，很坏的咯！非常爱日系，我知道你喜欢，我又不是很中意，可是我很享受每次你跟我说故事的时候，我总是托着我的下巴，听你的故事。喜欢和皮儿笑你走路的背影。遇见你和他们，让我增添了不少快乐。真的，当我们凑在一起一定有很多说不完的话，笑不完的故事，听不完的八卦，耍不完的三八。没有你在我身边上课，真的会口臭。有些时候，我常告诉你，你有一张让人骂粗口的嘴脸。其实，不是啦，只是在你面前才是那个真正的我。每次我有什么风吹草动你都知道我要说什么。每次我的眉毛稍微飘一下，你就知道我又想做些什么。找到一个知趣，懂你的朋友不多。你曾经问过我：有一天如果你遇见TA你会怎样。我二话不说告诉你，我会指着她，一堆我一辈子也不会骂多的粗口应付她。干！谁让她辜负你了。义气，是这样吗？那天，我告诉你，我对他开始措手不及了，你知道我的脾气我的性格，你知道我要的东西，于是，你拼命地想敲醒我，我都知道，我真的知道你为我好，怕我又受伤。你知道吗？你曾经说过一句话你说我真的生气的时候，我不会让人知道，我会安静的假装没事；当我告诉你我生气的时候，就是假生气。当你告诉我的时候，我真的很感动，真的感动。怎么就那么了解我？谢谢你，我的生日。你的蛋糕，真的，感恩认识你。我有朋友在我生日做蛋糕给我庆祝，说出去不知道有多少人羡慕然后BEH KAO 我。谢谢你，让我在最伤心，最脆弱的时候，听我，支持我，骂我。永远永远记得，无论发生什么事我都会挺你，我一定bird 你。
我曾经问过你：是不是无论发生什么事，你都不会离开我？当你回答我“是” 的时候，我安心了。敏，有你最好。我一定会好好珍惜我们这段友谊。谢谢你包容我任何的缺点。

珍惜。

人活着要懂得珍惜。真的。女主角就是因为那样不惜福，不珍惜，就那样错过了和男主角在巴黎铁塔下讲电话的机会。领悟。我要学会珍惜，学会惜福。那天我告诉妈，考完试，我要学做蛋糕，学做饭。我妈瞪大眼说，这是怎么啦？有男朋友了？转性了？我说不是啦，只是我妈妈那么厉害，什么都会，做饭，做蛋糕，缝纫，啥都会，她女儿却好像千金小姐，什么都不会。我决定好了，我要学做饭~ 那样，让自己更独立，更强大，学会长大。爱惜身边的所有人，珍惜自己现在有的。不要错过才惋惜。

先喜欢上你，就像是先发现这个世界美好的一面，那又何须惆怅？

你说你会哭，不是因为在乎。

是我还没有准备好？还是不开口才珍贵？还是我自己不敢面对自己？不敢面对然后把所有人驱之千里？怕受伤？我是。没有安全感？真的。只要有一丝猜测，怀疑，你就失去了我。这种观念一直在我心里，可是这样下去，对我，对你，对他，很不公平。我的问题，不是时间，就是性格。找一片能符合自己的那块拼图，真的那么难？还是我不敢接受这样的命运？难道还相信现实生活还有王子与公主？

不是。时间不对。人不对。性格不对。想法不对。

最近和篮球号太靠近了，真的有一刻认为那是他吗？可是我们的性格都太一样了，我们在同一个地方生活了5年，今年才开始比较接近。性格太倔了，我们都一样。常会吵架，可是没多久又好回，我真的很害怕，没有安全感，不敢相信，这种感觉很危险，好像还没拥有就会失去，让我不敢告诉他。可是他好像什么都知道。他了解我，宠我，要什么，就会得到什么。可是越是这样，我越是害怕。越是不敢捉紧。我让他猜不透。我不开心，发他脾气，他就赶快找我,真的有一刻我是幸福的。

有人说，如果有一天见到奇景，你第一个会想起的人，那才是你爱的人。

你呢？第一个会想起谁？

我不知道。真的不知道。怕错过，又不知道是不是。王子呢？他在那里过得好吗？我不知道，应该好好吧？不知不觉，那么多个月过去了，应该还能适应吧？那天， jay 向我提起过他，他问我，他会是你的future? 我。嘻嘻害羞了。王子吗？所有人都觉得他是我最最适合的人选，天知道。一个什么都能让给你的人，不够好吗？好，可是我们的时间都不对。时间会证明也会告诉我们一切，对吧？只要梦想理想正确，准确，没有理由我们不会再相遇。本来就不是平行线，离别只是短暂，是为了下一次的相聚更有意义。

笑得灿烂。活得精彩。

这感觉已经不对，我在努力地挽回。

Ciao ciao! <3

Crys.

The Long Lost Way.

My dear blog:

Hey.It's been a long time I updated my blog. I mean I RENEW the blog again. Sounds so childish right. Suffering for exams again. For the real ones soon. AS is coming around the corner. I believe I left 8 days? Law papers will be the very first subject. Well, being selfish, I used up almost a whole month (September) for only Law revision. Till now, I have finished 90% revision for ELS but remain Human Rights and Common Law and Equity haven't finish. However, frankly speaking, I have nothing in my head. OMG. 8 days left and I still have ntg. I should try out the 30mins practise for this whole week. I think it will work. Will try. Will see. Considering which topics to be left out. Well as a typical student you will know that feeling. Yea, that feeling you need to cover all the topics yet the exam only comes out 6 topics. As Usual. I have limitations. I can't memorise everyhing from the texts, statements, notes, chapter packs and all law facts. One thing, Law is not only for memorising. Since the day I started to read Law, I finally realized that Law is ______________. I can't really use a word to describe. It's quite frustrated to describe this subject. this area. (fill in the blank pls)

Acconting. Economics. Business Studies. I have the courage to take 4 subjects. But I am not that briliant to score all 4 subjects. Maybe you will say I should'nt give up this early. IKR. I won't give up. I will try my best and of course DO. A level is not easy. Taking 4 subjects are only a challenging task. Not everyone can cope with. But luckily, I can deal with it and for those previous assessments and mocks, I din't fail any of it. Well, what Jasal quoted  "No pain, no gain." Yeah right, I swear. After Law papers, I will use a week to brush my Economics and Accounting. Looking forward to my After exams' travelling plan. Should book the flight now weii. So excited.

Oh dear. Tap exam soon. Very soon. 1 more month. Advance1. Me and Phoebe will be a group again. Partnering for almost 11 years. Hah. Time flies right? I danced together since young. Until this year, I left her to another school. However, we still partner for the coming exam. Not an easy task, because we grow up and tend to compete each other. Although we are competitiors but we still help each other. Like what she told me last week, we can't improve anymore if we don't dance together. In the mock examination hall, we first met and danced together again. We were both tension and afraid. We started to mix up all the steps and became unstable. For the whole dance, our teacher told us that we were to nervous to dance with each other. Maybe because we aren't used to it anymore. Or maybe will know that this will be a true competition between to of us. AGAIN. The brain kept singing < she improves a lot then. > Tap class yesterday. Phoebe was absent. She forgotten. So, only me and Xuen Wei with Ms Pixie. Hah. Just like an one-to-one private class. I learnt alot. Quite a lot. Cause XW will not taking exam this year so I am the only one who Pixie need to concentrate with. She brushed all my amalgamations and timings for here and there. Exhausted! ( wanting to get a new pair of tap shoes)... ^^

:( signing off soon. Need to start my CL and E. Ciao ciao.! <3

我愿意用所有的努力，换取我永远的骄傲。